Working with Others - How self-awareness helps those around you. - #051
It's natural to be focused on yourself when you're thinking about self-awareness and understanding strengths but there are a lot of benefits to those around you. In this episode, I'll go over some to the benefits for other people and how knowing yourself helps you communicate, interact, and work with those around you.
This is Episode 51 and I'm Josh Newton.
Welcome to the I'm Josh Newton Show where it is all about putting your potential into practice.
Today I want to talk about how understanding yourself and having some good self-awareness about who you are helps you work better with others.
One of the things that I've seen happen when somebody starts to get some self-awareness about themselves and they start to gain an understanding of what their strengths are and how their hardwired is they really start to appreciate and understand other people. In a training I was in at one point I actually had somebody say, 'you mean other people are different they're not wrong?' And this was obviously meant to be funny but at the same time this was actually a realization that this person was having, that all the people that they've been frustrated with all of the people that they thought were just operating incorrectly because they weren't operating the way they are, are actually just different. They have a different way of viewing things they have different needs they have different motivations and this can be frustrating when you're working with those people, if you don't have a common language and you don't have an understanding of who you are and maybe have some other people are hardwired so that you can either communicate about the differences that you have or understand that the differences that they bring to the table that are different from how you operate, actually round you out and provide something to that project, to that company, to the organization that you can't.
It's much easier to get along with people that are hardwired in the same way we are. So if you're very detail-oriented and you have other people around you who are the same way, you're often looking for the same level of details you're asking very similar questions and so it's not common to be really frustrated with those people and not understand where they're coming from. But if you have somebody who's not detail-oriented, that person might be very frustrated with her not moving forward and not getting things done and they may even if you asking questions as a waste of time and something is getting the way of actually executing on the plan that you already have even though you think maybe asking those questions as part of developing that plan. It just depends on how your hardwired. There's certain things that we see as natural or that makes sense or it might even we would say our common sense but to other people who are hardwired different from us, those aren't things that they see all the time. So the first part of this is really just understanding other people being able to have a sense that other people aren't operating it away that's purposely trying to frustrate you. They're not offering a way that isn't effective usually on purpose it's actually because of the way they're hardwired and the natural abilities and strengths that they have is a person.
The natural step after understanding that people are operating out of their natural skills and abilities is an appreciation for those natural skills and abilities and talents that they bring. And it's not even just their skills and abilities but even the point of view in the way they view things can be really valuable especially if it's different from yours.
One the other really big benefits of understanding your strengths and really focusing on gaining some self-awareness for not just you but also the team around you whether that's on a project in organization in your family even, is that you really start to understand where everybody's niche is or where their lane is and it actually creates a lot more effectiveness and Harmony within a team when everybody really understands what they do best and what that thing is that they should be focused on. And once people really gain this understanding because they're operating out of who they are and how they're hardwired, it really creates an environment of trust in this trust actually allows you to move with much more speed than if you're constantly worried about in my stepping on somebody's toes is this what I should really be doing, what's Jim doing is he really focused on the things that he should be doing is Sally doing things that she should be doing? If everybody knows that. Their role in the responsibility is actually associated with who they are and what you've identified as a strength that they have in natural abilities that they have. You get much less of these politics or this bickering or this constant worrying about are we doing the right thing?
So if you're somebody who has maybe heard of this idea of self-awareness and emotional intelligence and focusing on your strengths and all of these different things before, but you really wonder how does that get outside of just my little severe where I'm focused on myself, this is where it really adds value to the people around you where it adds value to how you work with other people and also how it is specially in the work context or project context or within a family, how it can actually make a group better.
A fun little exercise to get you started in this direction is to spend a couple of days trying to identify some people that seem to be very different than you are. And again this can be and you're work it can be in your family it might be on a particular project that you're working on it in your organization. Spend a couple of days kind of just paying attention to how everybody operates and things that they do in the things that they say and see if you can identify a couple of people who seem to be very different from you. Some of the things that they do when they say may actually seem really strange because they're not things that you would have done. Then actually spend some time thinking about what might be going into those actions and those behaviors that you're observing. Whether you view this as deploying some empathy for these people, whether you view it as almost an anthropological study because that's the kind of person you are, this will really benefit you and really starting to understand how other people operate, where they're coming from, and how you might be able to work better with other people if you gain some understanding of who they are and what goes into the behaviors and the things that they do.
As always I would love to hear from you. If you're listening to this on Anchor, you can give me a call in or leave me a comment. If you're listening to it anywhere else, you can find me on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram under I'm Josh Newton.
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